If you could have a conversation with your fear, how would it go? Would you cringe and run away or would you confront it?
Well, let’s see shall we?
You– *mumbles* I don’t feel good at all. God. I need to get away.
Fear– Why? Is something wrong?
You almost loose balance and trip over your legs in search of the voice that came from somewhere behind you.
Fear– Hello. It’s me. (I just had to. Okay?)
You– I know it’s you. I should have known it’s you. I don’t just get sweaty hands at the same time feel cold for nothing.
Fear smiles and shakes it’s head.
F– Do you really hate me that much?
Y– I don’t hate you. I fear you. I think you know that.
F– But why?
Y– What why? I just do. My throat closes up, I feel sick and shaky. So nervous that I might puke.
F– You fear me THAT much? I make you sick?
You nod. And instantly Fear looks sad. Like it’s disappointed that someone like him/her/it can cause that reaction.
F– Other’s don’t react that way. Some do but many don’t.
Y– Yeah, I know. I wish I could too.
Fear nods excitedly. He exclaims- You can! You can!
Y– No I can’t, Fear. It’s not possible.
Fears looks at you dubiously.
F– Ofcourse it is. Not everything is not possible. I am not that scary as you assume I am. Do you get scared of writing or running or making new friends…or whatever you don’t fear?
Y– Ofcourse not. Other wise they would be here talking to me too, not just you.
F– Well then, why am I any different?
Y– I don’t know. You always have been. I always react the same way from as long as I can remember. With others, it’s always been just natural.
Y– Yeah. Well, writing wasn’t something I did always.
F– But you don’t fear writing anymore and showing it to people now, do you?
Y– Nah. Where are you going with this?
F– At one point you must have been scared of writing or something else. And now you don’t. It took time but you got over it, right? So work on me too. I am not that different.
You sigh and shake your head.
F– Don’t give up on me. Or yourself. Try and I know you will succeed.
You shake your head vehemently.
Y– You won’t understand.
F– I will. I am. I know the likes of you. You see me as a monster. I am not a boogie man that hides under your bed just to scare you. I don’t have that much time. It’s you who sees me as a creepy, weird monster. If you tried to see me as something else, if you tried to remove that fear from your head for one second, you would see that I am not different.
You are silent. You don’t know what to say. Fear almost looks insulted and hurt from the way you react every time it creeps on you…so you say nothing.
F– Tell me. How do you feel when someone reads your writings, or when you interact with new people? Do you feel cold, sick, puke-ish?
Y– No. I don’t fear them, Fear. I feel warm and fuzzy. Because I have been doing this for a long time now. I am okay with those things. I feel safe.
F– That’s because you are used to them. You see them as something safe. Then see me like that too. Work on me. I assure you, I will become your safety net soon. Take one tiny step at a time.
Fear looks at you pleadingly. You sigh. Again.
Y– What about others?
F– Others? Other fears?
Y– No. Well yes. But I mean people. Other people.
F– You can work on your other fears too. One at a time. First work on me. I came here first.
You smile and shake your head. This is ridiculous.
F– And people? What people?
Y– People. They will be watching me, judging me when I work on you. I hate that. That’s an anxiety in itself.
Fear looks at you weird.
F– So what? That’s there job, I suppose. I haven’t met anyone yet who didn’t judge at least once in their life. You seriously care about that?
Y– Fine. Let’s say that’s my other fear. Then?
Fear rolls eyes.
F- Really? People judging you? That’s your fear?
F– Then judge them back. *Rolls eyes*
Who cares! You do your job. And once you are good at it, we will see who judges last.
F– Okay then. Don’t give up on me.
Y– I will try.
F– Or I will legit haunt you next time.
You both laugh.
Who would have thought, that Fear would make you confident in the end?
That’s how it always is though, isn’t it? Things you fear, make you confident about yourself. Maybe it is worth confronting your fear and not giving up on it.
“Thinking will not overcome fear. But action will.” – W. Clement Stone